What is a sponsor? Is it someone to run your life for you? A spiritual advisor, financial advisor and marriage and relationship counselor all rolled into one? Actually none of the above is what an AA sponsor is supposed to be, even though many people seem to think that is the case.
In the early days of AA a sponsor was someone who helped sick alcoholics get into hospitals. Keep in mind this was long before the days of treatment centers like we have now. Hospitals would take in drunks who were sick and keep them for a while to let them sober up and get their health back, providing them with some good nutrition and medical treatment. In some cases they were a little hesitant to take in certain patients and an AA sponsor was someone in AA who would enter into an informal agreement with the hospital to make sure that the patient would have plenty of AA visitors while they were there to give them a jumpstart on their recovery. The sponsees really got a lot of attention. The AAs would come in and share their stories with them and the patient would get a good education in how things worked, so when they got out they could meet with the AAs and carry on with their recovery.
Over the years, as treatment centers popped up all over the place, this kind of sponsorship was not needed and sponsorship slowly evolved into something totally different. Slowly but surely a sponsor became the all purpose guru who a newcomer would first meet at a meeting, ask them to be their sponsor and then go to them for any and all kinds of help, and the sponsors with big egos would eat it up. There are still many of these big ego sponsors around today. Many of them will make all sorts of demands on the newcomer, often talking down to them and making them jump through hoops just to keep them as a sponsor.
The best sponsors, however, are not into playing the bigshot and will not try to run their sponsee's life. Instead they will guide them through the 12 steps and provide them with guidance and friendship, all the while encouraging them to take responsibility for their own life and recovery. In this way they help them to grow confidant while growing along spiritual lines. Yes, sponsorship has changed over the years, but is still a vital part of AA recovery.
