Saturday morning I attended the best meeting I've been to in a long time. It was the Morning Meditations meeting. There was only about eight of us there and we had a really good discussion.
One thing that came up is how alcoholics have such a hard time forming a true partership with another person. I definitely could relate to that. Looking back on my previous relationships I can see that I never really formed a true bond. I thought I had when I was in the relatinships but looking back I was never able to truly commit to them emotionally and never really trusted them enough to share my innermost thoughts and feelings like I should have.
I wish I could say that I know it will be better next time I get into a relationship, but I can't honestly say that. Sometimes it seems like that will never happen anyway. I really miss loving someone and having her love me. Sure, I've had women interested in me but not ones I'm really interested in. I look forward to the day that I will find that special someone. Hopefully when that happens I will be able to make that connection on a level that will allow us to bond and stay together.
