At last night's meeting we talked about loneliness and how it seems to be one of the common things that haunt alcoholics. I definitely could relate. A couple of us mentioned the experience of feeling all alone in a room full of people. Oh, how I hate that feeling.
I mentioned that it is also connected to that terminal uniqueness that we tend to be plagued with from time to time. That strange voice in our heads that tells us we are different from everyone else. It's one of those AA paradoxes where we want to fit in and be like everyone else but at the same time we want to be different - actually better than them in some way.
Isn't it strange that as we feel inferior to everyone else we also think that we are better than them? Very strange indeed! Yes, loneliness is a real bugger for many of us. I still feel it very strongly sometimes. I suspect it will never go away for good.
Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we are not alone, and that there are people who really do care about us, and even a few (fellow AA members) who actually understand us. We are not alone, even though sometimes we need to walk a solitary path for a while.
